What happens when kids lack life experience and strong imaginations come together? You get some of the wackiest beliefs imaginable. At least, as adults, we think they’re wacky. There are a few of the most hilarious, laugh-out-loud beliefs that most of us pretty much fell for as kids.
1. Packing Peanuts Are Edible
Maybe this one is just me, but I grew up believing that the packing peanuts used to keep items safe while in transit could be eaten. I fully blame my brother, who I vividly recall told me this on several occasions. The thing is, they aren’t, and if you do try to eat them, you’re going to cause a mess of gastrointestinal issues for yourself. Just look at them! They look like cheese puffs, can you blame me for falling for it?
2. The Moon Is Made of Cheese
Who doesn’t remember this classic like that we were told? While the surface of the moon may look like a block of delicious cheese, it’s just a boring ‘ole space rock. Funnily enough, there may be an origin story to this childhood myth. In 1546, The Proverbs of John Heywood noted, “the moon is made of green cheese.” Heywood, as it were, was a 16th-century English writer and playwright, so of course he was having some fun with his proverbs.
3. A Fairy Took Baby Teeth
Was there anything more magical than putting a baby tooth under the pillow only to wake up with a quarter or dollar bill underneath? Believing in the tooth fairy made losing teeth a fun experience, which is probably a good way to frame what really could be a traumatic experience. Many adults passed this tradition on to their children, though they do leave a bit of the legend out. It’s believed that the lore of the Tooth Fairy and the obsession with baby teeth stemmed from Viking culture. When parents left their children for war or exploration, they carried their baby teeth for protection.
4. Did You See Santa?
Many children anxiously wait 364 days a year for the minuscule chance of seeing Santa guiding his gift-filled carriage across the sky. Some would claim to see a sparkle in the pitch-black sky on Christmas Eve while others swear they hear footsteps on their roof. Of course, as we get older we learn the magic of Christmas was all thanks to our parents and guardians, but those memories of searching for Santa and sharing our stories with friends after stick with us forever.
5. Adults Know What They’re Doing
Many kids believe as a fact that adults know everything. While it would be nice to grow up and figure everything out, that’s not how life works. We face complexities every day that challenge us in new ways, and sometimes it’s really difficult to overcome them. Save for this little blurb, we’ll never outright admit to our children that we’re practically clueless. They should feel confident knowing that we have a handle on things and will always have the answers to their problems.
6. The Key to the City Is All-Powerful
When the hero saves the town and the mayor hands them the key to the city in movies and TV shows, kids begin to believe that “this key” is a powerful tool. They may believe that a ceremonial key could open any doors inside the city like a wide-reaching skeleton key. The reality is far less exciting. It’s essentially a symbolic trinket that will collect dust on someone’s mantle. It’s an honor to be given the key to the city, but it’s not quite as awesome as it sounds.
7. Teachers Never Leave the School
It’s common for kids to be shocked when they first see their teacher out in public in town. Many kids believe their teachers don’t have lives outside of school and instead come into existence every morning when class begins. It turns out that teachers are human beings with their own lives, though it’s worth mentioning that much of their home life is spent working on the curriculum and grading papers.
8. Watermelons Will Grow in Your Tummy
I remember believing this one as a kid. I loved watermelon (and still do), and at summer camp, I’d shovel watermelon slices into my mouth without regard for the seeds. Then, one of my counselors warned me that I better watch out or I’d start growing watermelons in my tummy. I was more careful from then on, though I don’t know why I believed them. How did I think the watermelon would be expelled from my tiny body?
9. Brown Cows Make Chocolate Milk
Kids’ logic can both make sense and be completely ridiculous at the same time. Many children believe that white cows make basic milk and brown cows make chocolate milk. But there’s a problem with this logic. Where do we get strawberry milk if there are no pink cows? While this is certainly something children believe, I firmly think some adults question what kind of milk is produced in brown cows.
10. Swallowing Your Gum Turns You Into an Ogre
Some say they were terrified of swallowing their gum as a kid because they feared it would turn them into “ogres.” While I’ve never heard this one before, I’ve listened to various iterations of this childhood belief. I thought if I swallowed my gum, it would stay in my digestive system for years. I think that’s much scarier than turning into an ogre, though the science behind turning into an ogre is far more interesting. Is it a specific type of gum, or will any gum get the job done?
11. Quicksand Is a Massive Threat
What’s with all those cartoons displaying quicksand as an inevitable threat to our livelihood? While quicksand is scary, most people will never come across it in their lives. And those that do will find it’s not quite as deadly as depicted on TV and the Silver Screen. To survive, you just need to stop wiggling so much.
12. We Have To Mow the Lawn, or the Grass Will Grow Forever
Unmowed grass quickly becomes unruly, but I’ve never seen it grow taller than six feet high. But kids with limited life experience often believe that we must mow the grass or it will continue to grow forever and ever and reach the sky. To be fair to those who fell for this, it’s not entirely unthinkable. However, some of the most common types of grass will top out at around 2 feet if not mowed.
13. Flatulence Outdoors Is Impossible
Children learn a lot by observing their surroundings and listening to what adults say, which can lead to zany beliefs. In our travels, we’ve heard that some people, as kids, believed that it was impossible to pass gas once outdoors. We’re not sure how this one works or where it originates from, but we do know it’s just not true at all. Some people are a blend of smells that should be kept in the safety of their own homes.
14. If You Reach the Horizon, You Can Touch the Sky
Understandably, kids may see the sunset and wonder if it’s possible to reach the sun in the sky by walking toward the horizon. Once you learn some basic earth science, this dream quickly goes out the window. I will say, the horizon never really loses its magic. It’s beautiful, even if we may not get to touch it.
