20 Bands That Would Be Terrible To See if Their Identify Have been Literal

Posted On Feb 16, 2024 By admin With Comments Off

What’s in a name? For countless bands worldwide, their name perfectly represents their music – a brand identity fans can latch on to. But what if a band’s name reflected what they actually were? Would they still be worth seeing in person, or would the concert unravel into some sort of disasterpiece theater?

1. Cannibal Corpse

Mosh Pit Concert — Image Credit: Shutterstock.

With a name like Cannibal Corpse, it leaves nothing really to the imagination. That sounds like a gnarly show! Especially if you count on hundreds of concertgoers and a mosh pit.

2. The Eagles

The Eagles on stage — Image Credit: Wiki Commons, Flickr, Rachel Kramer.

As majestic as they may be, attending a concert headlined by eagles sounds pretty boring. We’ll gladly visit an eagle at a sanctuary, but we’d be disappointed if we attended and got a cacophony of squawking and not “Hotel California.”

3. Massive Attack

Massive Attack Band — Image Credit: zixia / Shutterstock.com.

Massive Attack makes us think of everyone at the show having some sort of hypertension-based heart attack all at the same time. Listening to bandmates writhing in pain and calling out for a doctor sounds like an awful way to spend an hour.

4. They Might Be Giants

The uncertainty surrounding buying a ticket to a They Might Be Giants show is too much for many music fans to handle. You’re either going to be severely disappointed, or you’re going to see the most epic concert ever imagined. With Ticketmaster’s pricing, it’s not a gamble we’re willing to make.

5. R.E.M.

R.E.M. — Image Credit: Wiki Commons – Dr.Conati Roberto De Martino.

Talk about a total snooze-fest. Literally. On the plus side, I’m willing to bet plenty of people would pay concert prices for a guaranteed good night’s sleep!

6. The Smiths

Can you imagine the magnitude of this concert? There must be millions of Smiths in the world today, and they’d all be gathered on stage at once. It would be utter chaos. How would we even choose which Smith to fawn over?

7. The Killers

The Killers on stage during a concert — Image Credit: Raph_PH, CC BY 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons.

There would certainly be a lot of hesitancy to purchase tickets to a concert headlined by a bunch of “killers.” We would need to have some questions answered, first. Most importantly, are they actively killing, or is this like a past lifetime kind of thing? What did they kill, exactly? On second thought, maybe we’ll just skip this concert altogether.

8. Weezer

Seeing Weezer live would be a memory that would haunt concertgoers forever. Nobody wants to see Rivers Cuomo having an asthma attack on stage.

9. Anthrax

Is a concert worth it if you don’t make it out alive? The early 2000s was ripe with anthrax scares, so we don’t see many people willingly paying to be potentially exposed to the deadly substance.

10. Band of Horses

Band of Horses 2010 — Image Credit: TBS.

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but I highly doubt this band of horses has the finger dexterity to play music. But even worse, the nightmare scenario of being trampled by horses is very much in play when you buy a ticket to this show.

11. Spice Girls

Seeing the Spice Girls perform live was a dream for millions worldwide in the 90s, but not anymore. Would it be a concert headlined by girls made of spice? Or would they be peddling spices, like we were in some Turkish spice market? Then again, the venue would probably smell divine.

12. The Who

Imagine a sea of concertgoers all asking the same question and being utterly confused about who is performing on stage. That, ladies and gentlemen, would be hilarious.

13. A Flock of Seagulls

This one seems the most nightmarish of all the literal band names I’ve encountered. From the endless noise to the general destruction the seagulls would cause, it would be one of the worst concerts ever – but it wouldn’t be boring!

14. Smashing Pumpkins

The Smashing Pumpkins — Image Credit: Shutterstock.

Seeing Smashing Pumpkins live would essentially be a rip-off of Gallagher’s classic watermelon-smashing routine, but at least the first few rows would be in for a treat. With any luck, the pumpkin smashing itself would eventually settle into a groovy and danceable beat.

15. Imagine Dragons

Depending on what substances you ingest before seeing Imagine Dragons perform, this could be quite the experience. אָבער, on the other hand, it could also be a complete letdown. What if the show is just watching a group of guys on stage imagining dragons?

16. Rolling Stones

The Rolling Stones — Image Credit: Shutterstock.

There would be some robustIndiana Jones vibes during this show. אָבער, unfortunately, nearly every fan in attendance would suffer from broken bones at best – and being squashed at worst.

17. Puddle of Mudd

If you think dancing through puddles of mud would be wholly unique or remotely fun, think again. Just ask any Woodstock attendees if they thought the mud was the best part of the concert.

18. Barenaked Ladies

The Barenaked Ladies have historically not lived up to their cheeky namesake. Think of all the tickets they would sell! Think of all the creepy men that would come to their shows!

19. The Beatles

The Beatles 1967 — Image Credit: Various.

Have you ever actually heard what a beetle sounds like? It’s not pleasant, and definitely not something you should pay to see. Even worse, beetles can fly, and some can even reach up to 6.5 inches long. That, my friends, is nightmare fuel.

20. The Red Hot Chili Peppers

Under the Bridge by Red Hot Chili Peppers — Image Credit: Warner Records Inc.

Look, I love spicy food just as much as the next person. I wouldn’t pay, however, to see a group of people try to eat peppers. On the other hand, I might pay to see chili peppers attempt to play music.

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